Friday, August 14, 2009

OH WHAT A NIGHT


Up at the crack of dawn armed with cleaning supplies this chick was a woman on a mission. This is deep clean Friday. Ya'll know how much I anticipate this day. Every corner of the house is dustless, carpets dirt-less, floors gleaming and everything that can be disinfected is void of germs. The laundry is washed, folded and hung. The dishwasher has cycled through and the dishes are resting at home in the cupboards. Oh, there is nothing quite as exhilarating as the smell of a clean house that reeks of my favored mulberry essence. But wait! There's a stinky putrid stench reaching my olfactories, a proverbial distinctive odor that makes me cry, gag, and want to toss my cookies all at the same time. Yep, it happened last night.

Around dark-thirty Hubby started to lock the french-doors before retiring to the boudoir when I heard, "I've got you now you little rascal!!!" Scantly clad in lounge shorts, he dashed to the utility room to don the barn boots, grab his gun and dart to the carport . A skunk, genus Mephitus of the Mustelidae family who are noted for the excessive development of their anal glands spraying their acrid discharge considerable distances. My job was to keep track of the carnivorous quaduped who had picked a spot to hide under our car. Wearing my Victoria's Secret lounge 'jammies and flippies, I stretched out the french-door lighting bottle rockets under the car at PePe' La Pew who was NOT going to move. Hubby was crouched behind the car aimed for the hunt when Tiger the Wonder Dog , frightened from the fireworks, runs and scoots under the car. Did I say he was the brightest canine in the neighborhood? (I have seen this before only reversed... Wonder Dog sleeping under car...enter skunk) Finally after many bottle rockets and bellows of smoke, Pepe' runs out and around the back of the house. Hubby got a shot in that left La Pew sharing an aroma at our back door (crime scene above) and hiding in a corner behind the storage shed that hosts my rock garden.

Hubby and I trailed after him like a couple of spelunkers with flashlights in hand attempting to corner the pole cat to flush him out. Hubby posed at the back of the storage building armed like the hunky warrior he is. Me? Well, I grabbed the water-hose with the power nozzle to blast the smelly cat like creature toward Hubby. Good plan, right? Think again. Somewhere during all this excitement, Pepe' out skunked us once again escaping to join his family dwelling under our abode. They have been tenants prior to the Fourth of July. Not because we haven't exhausted our resources trying to evict them. Admitting defeat, Hubby and I entered our skunk christened home lighting candles as we ventured in. Yep, it's all spotless as the potpourri pot simmers and the candles flicker. I'm gonna' grab a tall glass of tea and take a long summer break because, "Oh What A Night!!!"


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10 comments:

  1. Wat an adventure! I'm sure you are very thankful that the skunk did not spray you! Hope you evict the littel critter soon.

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  2. You had me with the picture - at first glance, it seemed to be a gardening photo, but... a gun? What was a rifle doin' in the garden? I had to read on, and LORD! What a HILARIOUS adventure! This is the funniest thing I've read in a long, LONG time! Thanks for brightening my day!

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  3. o/^ :::high five to you!:::

    Looks like you have a few flowers here, too! LOL! Thanks for stopping by my blog :-) I love the smell of new babies, too, and totally understand regularly needing the grandma fix!

    Blessings,
    Tammy ~@~

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  4. Nezzy--
    Thanks for stopping by the blog.
    The picture you paint in my mind just makes
    me laugh. How funny. And yes, you two might make good friends with Mr. Bathrobe.
    See you soon.
    Melinda

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  5. So nice to meet you and oh what a fuuny story. I have been right there so many times. We have a silly heeler dog named Toby who has been blessed by the skunks 7 times in his lifetime. Once during a bout of extendend compnay staying. What a mess it was and he is a house dog who is soooo spoiled. Hope you resolve your skunk problem soon,
    Shanda

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  6. I know how to get rid of the skunks without killing them! It was the greatest thing the game and fish guy told me because I had skunks under our vacation home at the Colorado River and I had a Raccoon in our boat at our lake cabin. They told me to take a sock or something airy, I used a small garment bag to wash delicate clothes in. It is made out of material with tiny holes. Fill the bag with MOTH BALLS! Make sure you use the old fashion ones that smell, not the newer ones they make now that don't smell. Tie a rope to the bag and throw the bag under where ever they are, they cannot stand the smell and they will soon go find another home! This really works! It even gets rid of rats or mice too! Then after they leave, you pull the rope and dispose of the moth balls. This worked so good for us hope it works for you! Let me know!
    ~Ann

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  7. Oh my goodness! This had me laughing! It sounds like some of the adventures we have had here! It seems my husband is often venturing out into the night in his skivies armed with a shotgun to blast some night critter away!

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  8. Hello Nezzy,

    What a funny story..It does ring familiar..hahaha...although not for a long time, thank goodness. :0) And yes, sometimes our canines have a way of showing us how *precious* they really are. LOL

    Thanks for dropping by for a visit! I don't believe we've had the pleasure of meeting? I do hope you'll stop by anytime..I'm always close by.

    I have the links to the artists website that covered the motorcycle with crochet and knit if you'd like to see what else she has created.

    The one thing you can always say about creative souls is that "we don't always have the desire to conform to anything that is normal"....thus, the wild and funky and unique creations are abundant! LOL

    Have a lovely day,
    Stephanie

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  9. Thank you for stopping by to visit me and I will be adding you to my faves. What a great blog; and BTW special ed teachers are angels in my book! You are great!

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  10. HAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA! OHMEEEEEEE* THAT IS HYSTERICAL, and boy ohboy do I feel for you!
    We still have skunks gettin into our chicken coop at night. Everysingle day it reeks. GAGME
    Thee other night, hubby went out in his boots n lounge shorts... totin the shotgun. And as he peered into the coop a skunk had his hindend pointed at him as it was burried up looking for eggs in the dirt. A SNAKE was also in a nest box. He said he proceeded to get the barrel of the gun through the chickenwire and then when he shined the flashlite at the skunk it was GONE! VANISHED in thin air. ? We can't figure out WHERE they are gettin to so fast?
    So he shot the snake instead. lol
    WELCOME TO THEE OZARKS HUH?
    Hope you get your blasted stinkers. No candle quite does the trick does it??? heeheehaahaahoohoo

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Yippie Tie Yie Yay, I'm so glad you popped in. I adore, cherish and covet your comments. Even though I love seein' my name in lights I am an award free blog. Thanks for visitin' ya'll!

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