Uglier than a bucket full of armpits and thinner than an Amish phone book, Farm Boy buys these half starved sale-barn cattle to pretty up and fatten out. Believe me, these hungry bovines eat better than a empty bellied three hundred pound trucker at an all ya can eat buffet when they belly up to the feed bunks here on the Ponderosa. It sure doesn't take these Stravin' Marvins long to plump up and slick out.
Heck, these two beauties could join Beth over at" Social Climbers" for a Monogram Monday. Just look at how these two high society 'it' gals are monogrammed to the kilts. Folks, don't get your bloomers in a bundle, these ladies were previously monogrammed prior to landin' on the Ponderosa.
Shockin' as an electric fence durin' a thunderstorm, this Ozark Farm Chick was once a sorority girl herself! Yep, I've climbed a social rung or two myself but these days I'm a bonafied 100% Farm gal. Now, if ya'll a want in on the well kept secrets of the Main Line Socialites, I've got the book for you! Even an country lass from the Ozark Mountains can run with chic elites sportin' names like Bibby, Coco and Lilly followin' Beth's advice. Do ya feel as confused as a hungry baby in a topless bar dropped smack in the middle of a social settin'? The 'Preppy Bible' holds the key to your grip on scalin' the social ladder.
That sweet generous Beth over at" Social Climbers "is givin' one of my lucky readers a signed copy of her book "Social Climbers". Now, if that won't sweeten your bitter tea! All ya have to do is comment. That's it. I love the KISS method. Ya know, 'keep it simply sister' but please go visit this special blogger and say 'howdy'! Go, put your feet up and sit a'spell.
In 1990 the real 'it girl', Madonna, wrote and sang, "All you need is your own imagination...So use it that's what it's for...go inside, for your finest inspiration...Your dreams will open the door." This hit song is an upbeat dance~pop tune with heavy influences of the seventies disco era. After readin' Beth's book, you too will be strikin' a pose and singin' "Vogue !!!"
Ya'll have a blessed and beautiful Christmas.
" Social Climbers" can be purchased at Amazon.com.
Subscribe to:
Post Comments (Atom)
Good luck to your readers. Love the monogrammed cows.
ReplyDeletexoxo
SC
Those hungry bovines look kind of sweet in their own sort of way. I climbed a rung or two myself on that social ladder back in the day. Long since past it now. But I'll take a look at the book. Striking a pose is always fun. I do it every Derby Day wearing hats. You have a wonderful Christmas too. Take care.
ReplyDeleteAwesome post love your frases ! Big beauties in there own way ! Have a wonderful day !
ReplyDeletedon't enter me in the giveaway (not a high-society bone in this body and not much of a reader, either!) but wanted to comment that i'm glad your hubby is fattening up those cows. i know the end result won't be that happy for them, but they get to live the good life for a while at least!
ReplyDeleteOh Nezzy, no one but you could make those big 'ol cows sound so cute and appealing.
ReplyDeleteI gave up preppy after my sorority days too, but I bet the book is interesting.
Oh, the new "babies" are so sweet. I am so thankful that you have them and are taking good care of them.
ReplyDeleteHeaps of Hugs
Prudence
Yep, looks like they have possibly been around the block a time or two,and seen a branding iron a few times too.Hope they enjoy their time at the Ponderosa! Love the way you write so much more entertaining. Hope your Christmas preparations are going well! I will have to take time and check out Social Climbers soon.
ReplyDeleteNow I'm as confused as a hungry baby at a topless bar. I thought you were giving away a cow.
ReplyDeleteIt's so good that you are rescuing these cows. You are, aren't you? Or are they going to be on somebody's table eventually? They are not exactly cuddly pets, after all... :-)
ReplyDeleteYou are THE Person who definitely gives me a chance to laugh out loud.
ReplyDeleteBovines have to eat, too.
I love to read. Mostly, I read for entertainment. Wonder if Barnes & Noble has this book available for my NookColor? Off I go to check it out.
Have a great day, Nezzy.
hugs
Gerry
Hope those cows of yours are fat and glossy real soon!
ReplyDelete=)
Wow. They are not looking so warm and cuddly. Looks like a prison lineup. LOL!I would still be afraid of those horns sawed off or not. Have a beautiful Christmas now and God Bless.
ReplyDeleteHave fun with your new friends!
ReplyDeleteMelinda
Poor precious cows. I'm so glad they finally got fed. It's hard to climb a social ladder taking care of children all the time! No ladders in that career!
ReplyDeleteThose cows and me have a bit in common. We are all fattening up for the holidays! Thanks for the giveaway! The book looks interesting!
ReplyDeleteWell, I am not a social climber, but your posts are the best read in cyber space. No one does it like you and you should be doing your own book.
ReplyDeleteHope you are decked for the holidays! Would love to see what you do with a string of lights.
Hugs- Tete
Well they are a couple of interesting looking specimens. As a farmer from a way back, I always like the patchy faced ones best - they just have such character.
ReplyDeleteNot entering to win, but the word Vogue should never be followed by a picture of a cow. Just saying!
ReplyDeleteThose cows look graffitied.
Hi Nezzy, thanks for stopping by and your sweet comment, it meant a lot!
ReplyDeleteWarmest Regards,
Loretta
I'm glad that YOU popped in to visit on this Blue Monday, Nezzy!
ReplyDeleteHi Nezzy, just wanted you to know that Margaret Andrews' book came in the mail today. Thanks so much for hosting this give away. I'm anxious to start reading it. Do you suppose my blogging will improve?
ReplyDeleteIt looks like that bovine got BBQed on the hoof while passing by some hot branding irons toting cowboys before it landed at the ponderosa.
I'm glad that you guys don't brand the animals at the Ponderosa and I'm glad that I don't have to brand my little calves either I tell ya.
Just got another bull big calf last evening. It was a hard pull this time. Kept us busy till 9:00PM.
Stay perky. JB
Love your humor.
ReplyDeleteMake that a big bull calf, ha ha ha JB
ReplyDeleteThanks for stopping by and commenting - I'm impressed that you have only broken one ornament... as you can see a few of mine are missing - although some may have found their way to another box, since I believe I gad some help taking down the last tree!
ReplyDeleteLove your cattle... the girls look happy, sassy and plump! What a collection of 'monograms' as you call them... ouch!
fun post ! And Oh my!! those critters have seen the world! they have to have at least 4 brand each!
ReplyDeleteI can't believe all the brands on those animals! Her book sounds pretty wonderful!
ReplyDeleteThinner than an Amish phone book?!!!! That's good! I like the bovines. So were they branded? Or are they spray-painted? What do you do with them? Milk, beef, or offspring? Grandpa did all three on his dairy farm. As usual, it's fun and wonderful to hear from you!
ReplyDeleteWell the monogramed cows I feel sorry for. I'm sure they are better now that they are at your place.
ReplyDeleteAs for Beth's book, enter me...I've followed her for some time now. I'd love to read it!!
YOU ARE UNBELIEVABLY FABULOUS!!!!!!!!!! That confused baby in a topless bar.....teeeeheee..Oh Nezzy, you are a scream!!!!!!!!! Anita
ReplyDeleteWell, I'm not into climbing social ladders or any other kind of ladders at my age! LOL! So, thanks, but I'll pass on the giveaway.
ReplyDeleteI'm glad those poor cows are at the Ponderosa getting plenty to eat. Even if I'm sure I know where they're headed afterward. I was raised on a farm and it was always sad to see them loaded up and heading to the sale barn. I'd always get attached to at least one of them!
Hope you're having a good week, Nezzy!
That one cow looks as if she's been tattooed! Great giveaway idea! You have a Merry Christmas as well!
ReplyDeleteThanks for your kind comment, I feel your warm heart. :D You sure have your way with word, you could fill a book in 10 minutes flat my friend..why don't you?! ;D
ReplyDeleteGot to love the cows! Hey, using numbers and monograming is such a big thing right now, and I know the cows wanted to make sure that they fit in!
ReplyDeleteWhat a neat giveaway...You know that I want my name in the pot for sure!!
Sweet Christmas Blessings to you and your family..
Hugs,
Shug
Social Climbing? I know a gal named "Buffy"!
ReplyDeleteIt's her real name!
I'd love to win!
You do have a way with words and I love your stories. Thanks for visiting my blog and your nice comments!
ReplyDeleteI don't even attempt to climb social ladders, I'm afraid of heights... and falling.
ReplyDeleteYou crack me up! I just love the way you talk. I get lost in all of your analogies.
ReplyDeleteI think I'm too much of a softie to fatten up cows and know that they are going to be slaughtered.
You are so funny!! I can't believe the way you tie starving bovines with Madonna!!
ReplyDeleteI like Vogue!👍👩😃
Hi Nezzy, I see Steaks! Well I am not one to climb any social ladders at my age..I could have used a book like that 40 years ago:)
ReplyDeleteThem there bovines look like they are ready for the freezer....almost.
ReplyDeleteThey really are beautiful animals.
I was a farm girl once upon a time. Wish I still were.
Hope you have a very Merry Christmas my friend.
Hi Nezzy,
ReplyDeleteYour cows are looking quite pretty!
Looks like their loving their life at your place!
Enter me for the give-away, i am not into social climbing but it looks like a fun read!
When I was in high school I showed beef cows at the fair, even got to take mine to the state fair! They were quite a handful to show as I recall.
Big Hugs,
Cindy
EVERYBODY got body art today!
ReplyDeleteAloha from Waikiki
Comfort Spiral
> < } } ( ° >
><}}(°>
< ° ) } } > <
I was raised on a farm, sooooo the cows are a must have:). Hope you have a blessed day my friend!!! Hugs
ReplyDeleteUm...Nezzy? I never climbed anything but a stepladder and that's because I'm built so close to the ground. Do you still like me? :)
ReplyDeleteThank you for your sweet comment..you always make me smile and know why I love to blog.
Now...back to work!
Love'n hugs,
Mona
After I take a nap for 30 days,I'm ready for it--climbing the social ladder. I love climbing ladders which has nothing to do with the book.
ReplyDeleteI also love your cows and I think their pretty, but I've been known to kiss cows if their friendly cause they remind me teddy bears.
Teresa
Love this post. We have a farm in Ireland and my father did the exact same thing - bought thin, undernourished cattle to nurture them back to health. Bruff was a local town, and my Mom always asked if he was going in search of the "scruff from Bruff." You brought back memories.
ReplyDeleteWell, thank heavens.
ReplyDeleteI thought if I left a comment I might win a cow!
I can definitely have a book here, but winning a cow might cause some problems.
Giggle.
Thanks for the smile.
You're a gem.
You make me laugh out loud every time! Thanks for being your wonderful, creative self.
ReplyDeleteBloomers in a bundle???? How funny!!!! I've always said "Panties in a wad" --but hadn't heard the bloomers one!!!! Your sayings are fabulous... Do they just pop out of your mouth --or do you have to work at it???? Bet you learned some of them from a loved one...
ReplyDeleteI don't participate in giveaways --so please don't include me...
Merry Christmas to YOU and YOURS.
Hugs,
Betsy
Always love to visit you sweet friend!
ReplyDeleteLove the way you write.
Big Christmas hugs,
Kat
That's one healthy steer!!!
ReplyDeleteHave a good one!
Karen & the Hound
I don't think I've ever seen a monogrammed cow before!
ReplyDeleteI'm glad the giveaway is a book and not a cow! :)
Hahahhaahha!! you are so funny....always smile when i come on your blog.....have a nice day darling....love and morde from me....xxx...
ReplyDeleteLove the cows!!!
ReplyDeleteYou had me when you said "Amish phone book",lol. Richard from Amish Stories
ReplyDeleteYou sure know how to entertain us, Nezzy. I always enjoy coming over...Christine
ReplyDeleteThose sure do look like they need to more to eat.
ReplyDeleteI enjoyed reading and I did some catching up on your posts.
Your gd is adorable.
Hugs
What a cute giveaway; love your description of things, LOL! Merry Christmas to you and yours!
ReplyDeletebetty
So nice of you to come over for a visit! I hope you will read along forever more. I enjoyed reading your blog and think you're too cute! I'll be sure to follow you along from now on. :)
ReplyDeleteIt is always fun to stop by your blog. You make me smile! Enjoyed reading your description of those poor beleaguered looking bovines.
ReplyDeleteI love stopping by to see you. I hope I win the prize...but if I don't...I will buy my own. Loved the bovines. I live in the middle of a pasture of cows, horses, and donkeys....and love it.
ReplyDeleteThanks for stopping by to visit me in Florida. I loved the pics of your cattle. Made me remember the sights (and smells) of being on the farm!
ReplyDeleteCandy
Thank you for the opportunity to enter xo
ReplyDeletewow, that is alot of branding, my husband used to work at a cattle ranch.
ReplyDeleteOooooooo, put my name in the magic hat! I need something to read now that I am stuck at home recovering for the next three weeks!!!
ReplyDeleteFingers crossed!!!
Love,
LuLu~*xoxo
I enjoy all your comments over at PW. I smile every time I read them.
ReplyDeleteThanks for your contributions. :0 Kelly
Ooooh.. I think I like that even less than tattoos.. at least tats are by the recipient's choice. I'm glad you look after them. I won't ask about what happens after that. ;)
ReplyDeleteA kind and generous giveaway. I'll take a wee peek at her blog.
Wonderful giveaway! I am definitely ready to vogue! Ha!
ReplyDeleteThanks for visiting and for your invite to come and have some fudge. Love me some fudge!
Hugs
SueAnn
Harold & I are sitting here giggling at your 'tale' again, sweetie. I am 3-days-short & $10 missing. You give us such smiles, Nezzy.
ReplyDeleteHow's my girl coming along? Any news?
We've spent so much time at the Drs. that we are on first name basis now ... that is so sad.
Have a beautiful day, my special friend.
Merry Christmas
TTFN ~
Hugs of love,
Marydon
Nezzy darlin'!!! THANK YOU FOR VISITING AND YES, SHOUT IT FROM THE MOUNTAIN TOPS....JESUSSSSSSSSSS!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! WOOOOO..hey, do you think He really will come on a white horse???? Ya think there will be critters up, out, over there? Well, with HIS presence, I just may not even care.....BE WELL and CELEBRATE! Anita
ReplyDeleteOkay Nezzy, here I am. It is always so difficult to find a place to jump in line over here. After all the talk of cattle I swear I thought you said "If that don't sweetin' your bitter teat.." Anyway, I'm about as much of a Social Climber as Ma Kettle but would love to get in the drawing for the book. We can all do with a little status elevation.
ReplyDeleteSounds like a great book....i love the era ! Your cow are look good fat and sassy! Hope you are having a wonderful holiday season!
ReplyDeleteHI Nezzy! Oh, look at the cows! Glad to know they're all fattened up! Oh, Nezzy, you always have me gigglin' when I pop in! Love the way you tell a story! :)
ReplyDeleteSign me up! I'm always ready to win a giveaway!
Merry Christmas to you, sweet friend.
Blessings,
Shelia ;)
Nezzy -- you always make us smile (and giggle). I guess I don't need to visit, cause this gal is fat enough thank you! Hope you have a wonderful Christmas.
ReplyDeleteHugs and KISSes to you, darlin'. Thanks for telling me about this one.
ReplyDeleteBlessings for a wonderful holiday season.
xoRobyn
Oh the poor cattle, those stamps! But I am a meat eater.
ReplyDeleteWould love to win your giveaway Nezzy
Oh, those poor cattle...
ReplyDeleteAnd great book for a give-away.
You do give me so many smiles. Your comments make my day.....You are a gal that can tell a story....Merry Christmas....I love a giveaway....
ReplyDeleteI don't know where you get your writing energy! You make me laugh with some of your comments - and that's always a good thing. The book looks very interesting!
ReplyDeleteNice post! thanks for sharing..blessings soraya
ReplyDeletePersonally I think the bovine tattoo's are chic. :)
ReplyDeleteJules @ Trying To Get Over The Rainbow
Nezzy,
ReplyDeleteTHanks for visiting my blog...So glad you did so I could find yours.
That poor cow! Is that branding on his fur?
Have a good day. X
i love cows and these are beautiful and thanks for letting me know you did not mangle that cow with those letters.
ReplyDeleteGreetings From Southern California
ReplyDeleteThanks for a good morning laugh to start my day out right :-)
Merry Christmas & Happy New Year!
God Bless You, ~Ron @ *TOGB
Cute cows - in good, loving hands!
ReplyDeleteSocial climbing? That's a great idea, especially now when it seems we're all descending: economically, socially, culturally.
I sure do love to read and this book looks great! Thanks for you sweet comments on my post and thanks for the chance to win this book.
ReplyDeletehugs, Linda
I don't think I'm scaling any social ladders, but the book does sound interesting.
ReplyDeleteHi Nezzy, So glad to finally get to your blog and all seems to be working at the moment.
ReplyDeleteLove this post and I so needed this good humor tonight. Still giggling!!
Thank you for stopping by and your kind comment sweet friend. Wishing you and yours a very Merry Christmas and many blessings in the new year.
Hugs, Celestina Marie
Sounds like a great book Nezzy for social climbers...please count me in!!!! Wishing you and all the gang at the Ponderosa a beautiful Christmas xo
ReplyDeleteSorry, but I just couldn't get past "a bucketful of armpits"! Where do you come up with the colorful descriptions? You'll probably keep me in stitches if I ever hang out with you in real life. =)
ReplyDeleteI wish you and your family a very blessed Christmas, Nezzy!
Thank you Nezzy for your lovely congatulations ... wishing you and yours a wonderful christmas xxx
ReplyDeleteOh, Nezzy...you never disappoint with your similes. Reading this one during DEAR time (Drop Everything and Read), I took the liberty of sharing your first paragraph with my students. They loved them, too. :)
ReplyDeleteCount me in!
Thanks so much for dropping by my blog. I love meeting new folks! I think I'm gonna' enjoy following your blog :)
ReplyDeleteThat book sounds interesting...
Merry Christmas to you and yours, too!
Merry Christmas to you and all your brood :)
ReplyDeleteThose poor cows. I'm so glad they ended up at the Ponderosa! And Merry Christmas!
ReplyDeleteI'm here, Nezzy! And yes, enter me in this fab giveaway :)
ReplyDeleteHave a lovely!
xo, misha
Nezzy you crack me up with your southern way of talking. Too funny. I just love it and I'll pop over to your friend's blog. You're the best...the absolute best. I was feeling frustrated and then got your email and headed over here and started to read and cracked up.
ReplyDeleteOh you do make me laugh out loud Nezzy! I never leave your blog without a smile on my face. Is it too late to enter the giveaway? Sounds like a fun book. laurie
ReplyDeleteYour hungry bovines look like they have been at the feed for quite some time. They look great! I once bought two hungry looking calves at an auction because I felt sorry for them. You know that mother thing where we think we can fix every critter? Well those poor little things died and broke my heart. Never did that again. Hubby told me later I was supposed to look for healthy critters not those so weak from the runs they could barely stand. "but they needed me"
ReplyDeleteEnjoyed reading this post!
ReplyDeleteThank you for coming by my blog. :)
I know there has to be a way to keep track of who belongs to who and which one is which, but I sure wish poor cows didn't have to be branded quite so much. Glad they have fattened up a bit, and are not as "skinny as an Amish phone book" anymore. Girl, how do you come up with all these sayings???? :-)
ReplyDeleteYour local idioms are hilarious. Great post.
ReplyDeleteSo, what do you fatten your cows up on? What do you put in the feed bunks here on the Ponderosa?
Hi Nezzy, I'm sitting here feeling sorry for myself in Southern California where it's freezing cold and pouring rain. YOU just cheered me up and made me smile. If you could see the many layers of clothes I have on, you'd know I'm the furthest thing from a social climber or glamour girl there is!
ReplyDeleteSending hugs and love to you and your family. I wish you all a very merry Christmas.
xo jj
"Do ya feel as confused as a hungry baby in a topless bar dropped smack in the middle of a social settin'?"- as a nursing mama, I really love this sentence.
ReplyDeleteI love to read, I can never have too many books.
Poor things : thinner than a meat pie at Gregg's (as we would say over here).
ReplyDeleteLove that picture. Nezzy I am always touched to see a comment from you on my blog. Blessings to you dear one.
ReplyDeleteGood luck to everyone! Do not include me in your giveaway. Why? 'Cause this hillbilly debutante already has a signed copy from Miss Mainline herself! I always get a kick outta folks that think these 'bovines' are mistreated. When my Farm Boy and I lived on the ranch we had a feedlot, along with about 2,000 Mama cows. You got used to the feedlot smell but I always had to go into town during weaning time - it got so loud and made me sad. And I used to joke that they were the 'other women' in his life. I wasn't even near the top rung on his ladder - I was more like 2001. I sure miss those days. By the way Nezzy. Sally and I will be headed your direction the last week of July. Wouldn't it be fun if you, Ruthann from Sugarpie Farmhouse and me could all get together?
ReplyDeleteLoving all of your analogies. A Brit like Alan (I'm presuming he's English)I'd have to agree with his thinner than a meat pie at Gregg's though here in Newcastle in the north east of England we'd also say thicker (Ie more stupid) than a Gregg's Sausage roll.
ReplyDeleteAnyway, thanks for stopping by Pen and Paper, great to visit with you again, best wishes to you all and good luck with the giveaway.
Stephen Page said...
ReplyDeleteThank you, Nezzy, for that interesting info. I know the cow-calf open-pasture system well, but never learned the feed-lot or small-farm methods. I'll keep educating myself on your blog.
December 16, 2011 8:27 AM
HAHA! I loved "a bucket of armpits." What a great giveaway. Happy holidays to you, Nezzy!
ReplyDeleteI bet that hurts like crazy, i wouldnt have the heart to do that to a cow or bull. A human being is a different story maybe,lol. Richard
ReplyDeleteSo glad that you guys are feeding those babies! I married a dairy farmer at heart ...he grew up taking on the farm responsbility while his dad worked outside jobs. He doesn't farm now but he Suuuure wishes he did :)
ReplyDeleteQuoted you on today's blog post.
ReplyDeletesocial climbing sounds like too much work -smile-. I'll just stay on the farm and muck my own barn.
ReplyDeleteMerry Christmas from Thistle Cove Farm.
What a interesting post; nwvwe been a social climber; don't think i will start at my have.
ReplyDeleteRita
Hope this was freeze branding! How sad.
ReplyDeleteWe live in the country too - wouldn't give anything for it. Enjoyed your post and what an interesting giveaway - thanks for hosting,
ReplyDeleteKathy
The book sounds interesting. I just joined the Book Club in my little town. I will look into the book more and maybe recommend it as a read to the Book Club.
ReplyDeleteRight now I am as happy as a pig rolling in the slush, oblivious to all the well-dressed people walking around. Oh, Nezzy, SO glad I came by (Thank you, Unknown Mami). What fun it is to read your blog. I especially like your expressions (like a million other people :-D) I know I am going to be a regular here. Big hugs from India!
ReplyDeleteI bet there were a LOT of skinny bovine at the auction this year! Friends in KS and TX were telling me how many were being sold off at the auctions due to drought conditions there. Beef is gonna be high next year when there are no nice fat calves to sell off.
ReplyDeleteYou are too funny....I LOVE all your little sayings! ;) Stop on over at my farm and say hi!!!
ReplyDeleteI love your similes! Always make me smile. Those creatures at least get some pleasure before they go to slaughter. (I am vegetarian so always feel sorry for them!)
ReplyDeleteHave a very lovely Christmas.
Maggie X
Nuts in May
Patty you adorable creature! I think I'm in love with these bovine beauties! Poor things - all scarred and scared but safe now!
ReplyDeleteTake care
x
Nezzy,
ReplyDeleteI love your posts, always cheerful and warm. You are a gem!
Merry Christmas!
Doris
You are a true farm gal with such a pretty bovine!
ReplyDeleteSounds like a good book with your giveaway
Merry Christmas everyone and have your self a healthy new year. Richard from Amish Stories
ReplyDeleteHI There, Just stopping by again to say Merry Christmas to you and yours.
ReplyDeleteLove,
Betsy
are these keloid scars resulting from branding? Why do they have so many numbers?
ReplyDeleteMy mu used to buy piglets and fattened them for the table.
Merry Christmas, Nezzy!
ReplyDeletemrs a :-)
www.christianmomsonline.net/apps/blog
Awww, I can't help but feel badly about the cows being branded, even though I know it wasn't you who did it and I guess it is necessary to keep track of the cows in some way.
ReplyDeleteAnyway, what a fun giveaway!! Consider me entered!
BTW, I just realized I didn't e-mail you back about your "bounced e-mail". I don't think I got that last one you mentioned.